Thursday, March 19

White Guy Dunking Epidemic

Recently in college basketball there has been a horrible trend developing. White dunkers are failing to land on their feet after dunks. With the NCAA tournament starting in less than 3 hours, fingers around the nation are crossed for our pasty paladins of the hardwood. Observe our first case, Wyoming's Adam Waddell:

What did this young man think? He had just found the morphing ball on Metroid or something? Waddell was ok and kept playing.

Next we have Kristoff Ongenaet from Syracuse. With a name like Kristoff you know there could be problems, but to be fair he is probably the best dunker named Kristoff in history and his team had just played in 7 overtimes to get into this game against Louisville.

You have to love how the trainers need to be waived in by Jim Boeheim. A white dude just hit the floor on a dunk, grab a towel and run your ass down there! Fortunately Ongenaet returned to the game, he is afterall from the mean streets of Ghent.

These two young caucasians were able to escape without injury, but next time, the pale rider to the rim may not be so lucky. Right now we do not know a solution; some say it is to force them to do what they do best and play fundamental basketball and simply lay the ball up, but others argue that would take away their rights of freedom and expression. We are going to see a lot of dunkers with marshmallow complextions in the next couple of weeks and we should all be holding our breath when they reach for the rim.

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