Monday, November 10

Wagons East!

Special thanks to one of the EPA's junior administrators from the 3rd district for again inspiring a post.

Since Cleet has taken all the good college football games, I'm left with but one team's arduous journey across the country to do battle. Fighting tremendous odds, they prevailed...

Most people may not realize this, but the Wyoming Cowboys began their journey to Neyland Stadium months ago. They chose a profession, set out with their team with a dream of one day finding Tennessee.

Joe Glenn and his boys set out on a journey that would test their mettle, much more than the UT football team. Nightly, Joe would hunt, but only be able to carry 37 pounds of meat back to the wagon, barely enough to feed the 85 or so men he had with him.

Things were going surprisingly well when the big Cowboy wagon rolled into Kansas. An Indian Native American offered to help them pass the big Kansas river, but quickly he disappeared into the woods when trouble struck. Lost was much of their food as well as a reserve linebacker, but still they pressed on.

When they reached Kentucky, the ranks were wearing thin. One of the sports "trainers" perished, as the small meals were not enough to fulfill her 5'6" 195-pound frame's need for nourishment. Sensing his team's spirit faltering, Joe Glenn stood atop his wagon, looking out amongst his rag tag group and delivered a message they would carry with them to Tennessee, "Yes We Can."

After all of this, they went into Neyland Stadium and beat Tennessee 13-7! Phil Fulmer's players were crying about family and this is how they repaid him? 7? San Diego State scored 35 on Wyoming, at home.

Their story does not end happily, however, as on the return trip to Laramie, 17 players were struck with dysentery, two oxen died while attempting to ford the river, and the 47 players were eaten by this guy.


Cleet said...

Phillip has aquired cholera, and is dead. Also, Indians stole your clothes in the night.

The EPA said...

Whenever I hear the word Volunteer I think "half-ass effort." And that is exactly what happened last Saturday.

And what does it say when you lose to a school whose founders were on the way to Oregon, made a pit stop in Wyoming and said, "ya know what, this is good enough."