On Saturday, Michael Phelps will be hosting the season premiere of Saturday Night Live. He will be the 27th sports figure to host and the first non-basketball playing athlete to host a season premiere. With numerous blogs claiming they discovered the similarity of Phelps's failed attempt at facial hair causing him to resemble Gheorghe Muresan, perhaps this gives us a look at what to expect.
Continue reading for the Top Ten List.
I'm going to guess that there's a skit with Phelps celebrating ala "The Lezac Comeback," probably in an office setting. My darkhorses will be a skit featuring the green line, beating Will Forte in small task .01 at a time, and one where he can't swim (if they pull off a Phil Collins "In the Air Tonight" skit, I'll stand and applaud.
OK, OK! Now with the top ten...
10. Not in a hosting spot, but this appearance by Kerri Strug makes the top 10, solely because of "Béla Károlyi" appearing at the end. Easily the most compelling commentator of the last Olympics, maybe it was because he actually cared about the sport.
9. Satisfying Cleet's demands that I include a Miami athlete...
8. The Juice doesn't want to be black anymore, (insert getting away with murder joke here). I can't bring myself to make a Gilda Radner joke.
7. Due to our love of the NFL team songs, this one had to make the Top Ten. The only video I could find of Walter Payton, but hey, it's Sweetness!
6. Much more popular than A-Rod's Flaming Fajitas. Flaming Fajitas has very good food if you go on any random night, but if you take an important client or date, invariably the server will mess up your order, forget to refill your drinks, overcharge you for dessert, and the manager promises to move the server to the smoking section in the back of the restaurant. Their signature drink, the April Bomber, is pretty good, but it does give you blue lips.
5. Tom Brady moving around nicely, and putting moves on the ladies.
4. I miss the old Shaq, the one that made bad movies, video games, and rap albums. He was so much nicer than the most recent Freestyling Shaq, and he actually played in the NBA back then too.
3. I decided not to post the Stuart Smalley clip, because Al Franken is a (political comment censored). At least we know what Michael Jordan is doing instead of developing a plan for the Bobcats.
2. Joe Montana as Sincere Guy Stu. It's too funny not to make the list. Unfortunately, I like the rest of the internet, do not have the video, but here is the transcript of the oft-referenced, "They won't disturb me. I'll be masturbating."
Since I can't have nine videos for a top ten list, I offer this one as a peace offering. "Wacky-go-jacky on Cleet like a WNBA fan eatin a waffle!"
1. Lovie Smith's gameplan had him confused, but Peyton's good enough for the top spot.
Much more can be found about athletes on SNL here.